Dream Job Alert: Cadbury Is Looking for Professional Chocolate Tasters

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iStock

Can you taste the difference between semisweet and bittersweet chocolate? Do you have strong opinions on what makes a perfect cup of cocoa? If so, Cadbury wants to hear from you. As Insider reports, the candy brand’s parent company Mondelez International is hiring taste testers to aid in the development of their chocolate products.

The corporation, which also owns the chocolate bar brand Milka, is seeking applicants to fill four positions: three chocolate tasters and one chocolate and cocoa beverage taster. According to the job listings, Mondelez will train the new employees in sharpening their taste buds and broadening their flavor vocabulary, so no experience is necessary. The qualities they are looking for include a communicative personality, eagerness to try new products, honesty and objectivity, and a passion for all things sweet. Candidates must also be fluent in English and available to work in Reading, England, about 40 miles west of London.

Each job pays £9 ($12.44) an hour, with employees spending about eight hours a week working with other panelists in sensory booths and discussion rooms. The maximum 10 free chocolate samples they get to eat a day are a bonus.

Prospective employees have until February 16 to submit their resumes, but they should act fast: When Mondelez put out a call for taste-testers last year, they were flooded with thousands of applications.

[h/t Insider]

Get Paid to Write Dirty Jokes for Cards Against Humanity

tom_bullock, Wikimedia Commons // CC BY 2.0

If you've exhausted every possible joke combination in Cards Against Humanity, the makers of the game have a new outlet for your wit. Apply to be a contributing writer and you could get paid to write the gross, bizarre, and occasionally offensive cards that go into new editions of the game.

For the uninitiated, here's how Cards Against Humanity works: A player draws a black card, which has a sentence with a section missing from it, and puts it down for the group to see. The rest of the players then put down white cards with words or phrases that could potentially fill in the blank. The player who comes up with the best joke wins the round.

In order for the jokes to be funny, the cards themselves need to be well written. That's where the contributing writers come in. As the job posting explains, the new writers will make $40 an hour "writing poop jokes as needed." The position is remote and part-time.

To see if you're a good fit for the gig, Cards Against Humanity is asking that you submit ideas for 15 white cards and five black cards that best exhibit your humor and writing skills. They've even included a handy primer on "how to write cards that don't blow" for applicants who are unsure of where to start. "A good black card allows players to subvert an expected tone or logic," the guidelines explain, while white cards should have "distinct voice, perspective, or syntax." The page also includes general guidelines on structure and the Cards Against Humanity style.

To apply, submit your ideas through the website before August 31. And if you're looking for some offbeat inspiration, this 19th-century version of the game should kickstart your creativity.

Animal Sanctuary on the Greek Island of Syros Wants to Pay You to Take Care of 55 Cats

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iStock

Before you can fully commit to becoming a cat person, you need the space and the money to support your feline family. Thankfully, a cat sanctuary in Greece is willing to offer you all of the above. As TIME reports, God's Little People Cat Rescue wants to pay you to move to the island of Syros and look after all 55 of its cats.

According to the listing posted to the shelter's Facebook page, the job comes with an undisclosed salary; a small, semidetached house with fully covered utilities; and a private garden with views of the Aegean Sea. You will be responsible for feeding the cats, giving them their medicine, and handling all the general duties that come with running a cat sanctuary. The ideal candidate has some veterinary training, is 45 or older, and can drive the cats to the vet in a manual-transmission car if necessary. The job also requires you to handle feral and/or non-sociable cats at times, so it's best if you have some "cat-whispering skills."

The posting reads, "We are located in a secluded nature preserved area which is very tranquil and quiet in winter time but busy during the summer. You’ll no doubt thrive best if you are the type of person who appreciates nature and likes tranquility—and rest[s] comfortably in your own company. That said, you’ll never feel lonely in the company of the cats and you’ll be expected to live with a small handful of cats in your house."

After a volunteer period of a few weeks, you will be working about four hours a day for a minimum of six months beginning November 1, 2018. To apply, send your photo and resume to joanbowell@yahoo.com. There are plenty of cat photos from the sanctuary to peruse online as you wait for a response.

[h/t TIME]

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