9 People Who Killed John F. Kennedy, According to Conspiracy Theorists

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Keystone/Getty Images

According to a 2013 Gallup poll, 61 percent of Americans believe John F. Kennedy’s assassination was the result of a conspiracy. Among those who don't think Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone, the same names keep popping up. On the 55th anniversary of JFK's assassination, here are nine people and groups who've been blamed for killing the 35th President of the United States.

1. Lyndon B. Johnson


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A big contributor to this theory is Roger Stone, who wrote The Man Who Killed Kennedy: The Case Against LBJ. But Stone, a longtime Washington insider, is better known for having worked for Richard Nixon, Ronald Reagan, George H. W. Bush and, most recently (and controversially), Donald Trump.

Stone believes that Lyndon Johnson hired hitman Malcolm Wallace to do the dirty work, which explains an allegation that Johnson ducked before any shots were fired. Stone also believes that Johnson confessed to the crime: “Johnson’s mistress of 21 years, Madeleine Duncan Brown, who bore him an illegitimate son, said that Lyndon Johnson told her on the eve of the assassination, ‘After tomorrow I won’t have to deal with those Kennedy SOBs no more.’”

2. The KGB

Ion Mihai Pacepa, who was a general for the secret police of Communist Romania, blames the KGB for orchestrating the assassination in his book, Programmed to Kill: Lee Harvey Oswald, the Soviet KGB, and the Kennedy Assassination. As for how the Soviet security agency got connected with Lee Harvey Oswald, theorists cite Oswald’s residency in the Soviet Union from 1959 to 1962. During this time, Oswald also met and married his Russian wife, Marina. Before the Kennedy assassination, Oswald wrote a letter to his wife that contained the assertion, “I believe that the Embassy will come quickly.” Pacepa believes this note is a piece of evidence that the KGB told Oswald they would take care of his family.

In another theory, the KGB is responsible for the assassination, but Oswald is not. According to JFK assassination expert Bryan Ghent, these theorists suspect that Oswald “was replaced by a Russian agent who looked like him in order to assassinate our president.”

3. Fidel Castro


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Theories about Oswald’s connection to Cuba vary in extremity, and some of these theories claim Fidel Castro was directly involved in JFK’s death. As for evidence, Oswald was arrested in 1963 for passing out pro-Castro pamphlets for the New Orleans Fair Play for Cuba Committee. The other primary basis for this theory is Oswald’s trip to the Cuban Embassy, around two months before the assassination, where he allegedly had a meltdown because he wasn’t granted a visa.

In 1963, Castro—Cuba's longtime Prime Minister-turned-President, who passed away in 2016—was questioned about JFK’s assassination, but the U.S. government determined he was not involved.

4. Woody Harrelson's Dad

In 1980, Charles Harrelson was convicted of shooting federal judge John H. Wood, Jr. He was arrested in September of that year after a six-hour standoff with police on the side of a highway. During the saga, Harrelson confessed to the assassination of John F. Kennedy in addition to Judge Wood. He later stated he had nothing to do with the JFK assassination, claiming he only confessed to the crime to ensure that he would live longer.

5. Secret Service Agent George Hickey

In 1992, Bonar Menninger released his assassination theory in the book Mortal Error: The Shot That Killed JFK. The book details a claim that one of Kennedy’s Secret Service agents, who was riding in the car behind the president, shot Kennedy by accident. Menninger worked with Baltimore ballistics expert Howard Donahue to compile the evidence.

“It is a ballistically unshakable fact that the fatal shot came from a position behind and to the left of the president," Donahue told The Sunday Sun Magazine in 1977. The two theorists concluded that the shooter was agent George Hickey, who reacted to Lee Harvey Oswald’s first shot by shooting his own gun and further injuring JFK.

Hickey did acknowledge the accusation. He sued Menninger after the book was released, but St. Martin’s Press, the publisher of the book, settled.

6. The Central Intelligence Agency

According to author Patrick Nolan, who wrote CIA Rogues and the Killing of the Kennedys, a group of rogue CIA agents killed JFK. Nolan names James Angleton, Richard Helms, E. Howard Hunt, and David Phillips as members of the responsible group. He cites disagreement with Kennedy’s approach to Cuba as the group’s motive.

As for evidence, the most compelling is E. Howard Hunt’s deathbed confession to his family. Hunt, who was also involved in the Watergate Hotel break-in, allegedly revealed that the group of CIA rogues invited him to have a role in the assassination, which was originally supposed to take place in Miami before it was moved to Dallas. His son, Howard St. John Hunt, relayed his father's message to the Los Angeles Times, “He told me in no uncertain terms about a plot originating in Miami, to take place in Miami.”

7. Carlos Marcello

Lamar Waldron has written multiple books accusing the mafia of killing JFK. He also believes the CIA had a role in covering up the assassination. In his theory, mafia boss Carlos Marcello hired hitmen to assassinate Kennedy because the president and his brother, Attorney General Robert F. Kennedy, were too tough on mob-related crimes. In 1985, Marcello allegedly admitted to the murder, reportedly telling a fellow prisoner, “Yeah, I had the son of a bitch killed. I’m glad I did. I’m sorry I couldn’t have done it myself.”

8. Joe DiMaggio


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Even baseball legend Joe DiMaggio has been blamed for JFK's assassination. According to this theory, DiMaggio was sure that a member of the Kennedy family had had Marilyn Monroe killed. DiMaggio’s lawyer Morris Engelberg wrote that the Hall of Famer refused to go to events if there would be members of the Kennedy family there. DiMaggio apparently told Engelberg, “It’s in their blood, and what they did to me will never be forgotten. They murdered the one person I loved.” Even as crazy conspiracy theories go, this one's a little flimsy.

9. Alien Researchers

William Lester’s book, A Celebration of Freedom: JFK and the New Frontier, contains a letter from Kennedy to the CIA dated 10 days before the assassination. In the letter, Kennedy requested a “classification review of all UFO intelligence files affecting National Security.” Conspiracy theorists see a connection between this letter and Kennedy’s murder, blaming either a CIA cover-up or another alien research organization.

Lester maintains that the CIA gave him the letter, but government insiders believe the letter is a fake.

This article originally ran in 2013.

9 Other Things That Happened on July 4

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iStock/LPETTET

Of course we know that July 4 is Independence Day in the U.S. But lots of other things have happened on that date as well. Here are just a few of them:

1. Three former presidents died.

On July 4, 1826, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson—America's second and third presidents, respectively—both passed away. The two politicians had a love-hate relationship, and Adams's last words were supposedly, "Thomas Jefferson survives." (He didn't know that Jefferson had passed away a few hours earlier.) Exactly five years later, on July 4, 1831, fifth U.S. President James Monroe died in New York City.

2. Henry David Thoreau moved to Walden Pond.

On July 4, 1845, Henry David Thoreau began his two-year living experiment at Walden Pond, near Concord, Massachusetts.

3. Alice Liddell first heard the story of Alice in Wonderland.

On July 4, 1862, little Alice Liddell listened to a story told by Lewis Carroll during a boat trip on the Thames ... it would later become, of course, Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. It was published exactly three years later—on July 4, 1865.

4. Two famous advice columnists were born.

On July 4, 1918, twin sisters Esther Pauline and Pauline Esther Friedman were born. Today they're better known as Ann Landers and Dear Abby.

5. George Steinbrenner came into the world.

On July 4, 1930, future Yankees owner George Steinbrenner was born (and presumably fired the doctor immediately).

6. Lou Gehrig delivered his retirement speech.

On July 4, 1939, Lou Gehrig gave his famous retirement speech at Yankee Stadium after being diagnosed with ALS. He tells the crowd that he considers himself "the luckiest man on the face of the earth."

7. The Zodiac Killer killed for the first time. (As far as we know.)

On July 4, 1968, the Zodiac Killer murdered his first victims (that we know of) at Lake Herman Road in Benicia, California.

8. Koko was born.

On July 4, 1971, Koko, the sign-language gorilla, was born.

9. Bob Ross passed away.

On July 4, 1995, Bob Ross died, and all over the world, Happy Little Trees were a little less happy.

This list first ran in 2008 and was updated for 2019.

16 Savage Teddy Roosevelt Insults

George C. Beresford, Hulton Archive/Getty Images
George C. Beresford, Hulton Archive/Getty Images

Theodore Roosevelt had a way with words. Over his lifetime, the eminently quotable president and author popularized many witty turns of phrase. And though he wasn’t fond of swearing, Roosevelt didn't always speak softly, either—he was capable of delivering a savage insult when he felt it was appropriate (though usually he saved his irritation for letters and didn't deliver the insult to his enemy’s face). Here are just a few of them.

1. “An amiable old fuzzy-wuzzy with sweetbread brains.”

This insult was leveled at an anonymous Supreme Court Justice who dared to cross Roosevelt.

2. “A well-meaning, pin-headed, anarchistic crank, of hirsute and slab-sided aspect.”

Said of the Populist Senator from Kansas William Alfred Peffer, who was indeed hairy, tall, and lean.

3. “The shifty, adroit, and selfish logothete in the White House.”

According to historian Edmund Morris, in 1915 Edith Wharton had asked Roosevelt to visit Europe and report on what was happening to the French in World War I. But Roosevelt proclaimed that he would only go when he could fight, which he considered unlikely under President Woodrow Wilson, who Roosevelt said "cannot be kicked into war." The former president didn't have kind words for Wilson's supporters, either; he called them "flubdubs and mollycoddles."

4. “A cold-blooded, narrow-minded, prejudiced, obstinate, timid old psalm-singing Indianapolis politician.”

When he wrote this, Roosevelt was insulting President Benjamin Harrison, who had appointed Roosevelt as a reform commissioner because he owed TR a favor. Harrison quickly came to regret it: Soon after Roosevelt was appointed, he investigated Indianapolis Postmaster William Wallace … Harrison’s best friend. 

5. “[A] little emasculated mass of inanity.”

Roosevelt said this of novelist Henry James. James, for his part, said that Roosevelt was “dangerous,” and “the mere monstrous embodiment of unprecedented and resounding Noise.”

6. “The most intolerably slow of all men who ever adored red tape.”

This isn’t the nicest thing to say about one of your colleagues—in this case, one of TR’s fellow Civil Service Commissioners (and Civil War veteran), Charles Lyman. According to Lyman’s Men of Mark in America entry, published in 1906, “While Mr. Roosevelt's work and attention were largely given to the investigation of abuses and violations of the law and rules, and to the education of public opinion in favor of the reform, through public addresses and the press, Mr. Lyman's work was almost wholly administrative and constructive, his purpose and effort being to establish the reform on a sound and conservative basis and to develop it according to the more obvious and pressing needs of the public service.”

7. “A professional yodeler, a human trombone.”

Said of William Jennings Bryan, then Secretary of State to Woodrow Wilson.

8. “That leprous spot upon our civilization.”

Roosevelt didn’t have kind words for William Randolph Hearst’s New York Journal, who dared “[portray] me as attacking labor when I enforce the law as regards Miller in the Printing Office,” Roosevelt wrote to Harrison Gray Otis in 1903. Earlier, the paper had published an interview in which Roosevelt supposedly called the paper’s coverage of the lead up to the Spanish-American War “most commendable and accurate.” The paper’s coverage was actually full of inaccuracies, and according to Roosevelt, he never gave that interview—and loudly denied those words of praise.

9. “Puzzlewit,” “Fathead,” “Brains less than a guinea pig.”

Roosevelt reserved some of his harshest words for his hand-picked successor. Roosevelt and William Howard Taft had a falling out; eventually, after challenging Taft for the Republican nomination (saying, "I'll name the compromise candidate. He'll be me. I'll name the compromise platform. It will be our platform”) Roosevelt ran against Taft in 1912 as a member of the Progressive party, a.k.a. the Bull Moose Party, and that’s when the gloves came off.

And in case the guinea pig reference seems random, Roosevelt once explained that “Just as machinery can be expressed in terms of horsepower, so some intellect can be expressed in terms of guinea pig power,” and that certain accusations against him “can only be heeded by men with brains of about three-guinea-pig power.” After which the St. Louis Dispatch opined, "Col. Theodore Roosevelt has further enriched the language which so many of his phrases now adorn by producing the following conjunctive description: ‘Three-guinea-pig-power brain.’ This is considered vastly superior to Woodrow Wilson’s ‘single track mind’ phrase, which had a brief vogue.”

10. “A flubdub with a streak of the second-rate and the common in him."

Another insult aimed at Taft.

11. “The true old-style Jeffersonian of the barbaric blatherskite variety.”

According to Merriam-Webster, a blatherskite is “a person who blathers a lot.” In this case, Roosevelt was referring to Mississippi Congressman John Sharp Williams, who served as the Minority Leader of the United States House of Representatives from 1903 until 1908.

12. “He is evidently a maniac, morally no less than mentally.”

TR was a man of morals, and he used these harsh words in reference to his brother, Elliott Roosevelt, who had an affair out of wedlock that resulted in a pregnancy. In his autobiography, Teddy wrote, “Moreover, public opinion and the law should combine to hunt down the ‘flagrant man swine’ who himself hunts down poor or silly or unprotected girls.”

13. “[A] hypocritical haberdasher … An ill-constitutioned creature, oily, but with bristles sticking up through the oil.”

Said of Postmaster General John Wanamaker, after Wanamaker refused to intervene when Milwaukee Postmaster George H. Paul (more on him in a bit!) had “dismissed Hamilton Shidy for treachery and insubordination,” according to Edmund Morris. Shidy had testified against Paul in corruption proceedings.

14. “About as thorough-paced a scoundrel as I ever saw. An oily-Gammon, church-going specimen.”

Here, Roosevelt was calling Milwaukee Postmaster George H. Paul a fatty ham in addition to a scoundrel. (Paul would eventually resign in 1889.)

15. "Too small game to shoot twice."

Roosevelt leveled this dig at William J. Long, after the Wilderness Ways author attacked the president for giving an interview in which Roosevelt had accused Long of being a “nature faker.”

16. “He seems to have a brain of about eight-guinea-pig-power ... it is useless to have a worthy creature of mutton-suet consistency like the good Sir Mortimer.”

Written in a letter to Whitelaw Reid. Sir Mortimer Durand was a shy and formal British Ambassador to the United States from 1903-1906 (he also lent his name to the Durand line between Pakistan and Afghanistan). The diplomat was a huge fan of Roosevelt; Cecil Spring Rice wrote that “My chief (Durand) thinks Teddy R. the greatest man in the world and has treated me with immense respect since I let on that I correspond with Teddy. I tell him stories and he listens open-mouthed.” But Durand couldn’t keep up with Roosevelt, either in conversation or physically. Once, when the two went for a walk, Durand recounted in his diary that Roosevelt “made me struggle through bushes and over rocks for two hours and a half, at an impossible speed, till I was so done that I could hardly stand.” Yup, that sounds like Teddy!

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